Practicing “Self First” Is Not Selfish With Suzanne Culberg

Mar 6, 2023 | Learning from the Best, PodCast, Practice Makes Progress, Season 3, The Jam Room

The Back-Story

Suzanne is an international mindset coach, speaker, and author, who helps over-givers and people pleasers learn to say ‘No’ without feeling mean and reclaim the unapologetic badass they long to be.

Through her signature online program, Why W8? She helps women break the cycle of putting themselves last and instead build the confidence to set boundaries.

She’s a Certified Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) and holds a Bachelor of Medical Science (Honours). She also has Certificates III and IV in Fitness and is a Certified Sacred Depths Practitioner.

She lives in Sydney, Australia, with her husband, Jeremy, and her two young children, who keep her both busy and entertained. When she’s not coaching her clients, podcasting, or writing her popular newsletter, she can be found reading, enjoying Diamond Dotz, or burlesque dancing. She’s also a big fan of Yoga.

Show Notes

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In This Episode:
[0:00] Intro
[0:42] Suzanne’s story of business success
[3:16] What didn’t go as planned for Suzanne?
[7:47] How did she set up her jam room?
[14:48] How she gets good at what she does
[20:31] On having a coach and learning from other people
[28:22] What’s exciting in her business?
[30:40] Who would get the most out of her programs?
[31:42] Where to find out more about Suzanne
[32:05] Outro

Transcript

Read Transcript

Tim Melanson: [00:00:00] hello and welcome to today’s episode of the Work at Home Rockstar podcast.

Excited for today’s guest. She is a note coach , and all throw in and healer, and she helps over givers and people pleasers. Learn to set boundaries and say no without feeling mean. That is such an important topic. I’m so excited to be talking about it today. So excited to be rocking up today with Suzanne Colberg.

Suzanne, are you ready to.

Suzanne Culberg: Certainly am Tim. Let’s go. Awesome.

Tim Melanson: So we always start off in here, here in a good note. So tell me a story of success in your business that we could be inspired by.

Suzanne Culberg: Oh, that’s a great question. So I can think of so many, but recently, I launched my own podcast, which, uh, in my business it’s a whole lot of love and no perfection.

So I think so many of us hold ourselves back from doing things cuz it’s not gonna be exactly right. Like it’s not edited or there’s not the cover photo like we. I don’t know about anyone else, but I underestimate how much effort goes into making many [00:01:00] things, and then I give it a bash. So I, I put it out there.

It’s been out there for a week. It’s been fabulous. I’ve had so many downloads, so many emails, and yeah, there is so much, um, no perfection in there. And it’s just been just a great way to connect with so many more people. Yeah.

Tim Melanson: Uh, isn’t that crazy? And wow, you’ve already got some downloads. That’s pretty good.

Mine did not have very many in the very big when I first launched it. So good for you on that one. .

Suzanne Culberg: Thank you.

Tim Melanson: Um, yeah, it’s, it’s funny, uh, you know, I have this conversation with people all along. It’s like some people just don’t wanna take action cuz they wanna wait for it to be perfect. But you know what?

It’s better to take messy action. Just get it out there and, and get something out there cuz you’ll, you’ll figure it out along the way.

Suzanne Culberg: I’ve already had so many learnings like, cuz I didn’t really know what I was doing. Like I, I understand the concept and the material is great, but the delivery, and I remember the very first person I showed to was my husband.

He’s like, you should [00:02:00] number your episodes. Make sure you market as explicit because you know, I’ve got bit salty, I’m Aussie after all and like all this stuff. And I went from excited to like deflated balloon. So I was like, choose my audience. So then I sent it out to my email list and I was like, I am available for like love and praise and excitement.

I’m not available for any editing tips at this stage. And I think it’s so much about what we do is we, we let other people inadvertently, you know, burst our balloon by not being clear on what kind of feedback that we want. So yeah, I was so surprised to get so many downloads. Maybe it was a result of that email.

They’re like, what is this about? I need . I need to go and check it. But, um,

Yeah.

Tim Melanson: Uh, I, I agree. I think that telling someone that it’s gonna be bad or salty or anything like that is a great marketing strategy. People are like, really? Lemme check that out, . How bad are we talking here? ? Yeah. So well done on that.

Um, [00:03:00] okay, so now with the good note, I mean, hey, you’re kind of talking a little bit about some of the bad notes as well. So cuz there are things that don’t go as planned. So is there something like just over your business career that just didn’t go as planned and how did you get out of it?

Suzanne Culberg: Oh, just as many things has

Oh. So the, the biggest one that comes to mind, Quick cause I’m my coach. Initially I coached one-to-one and then I launched a group and I didn’t have very, I will like, this was on me cuz sometimes I think we can get really blamey, but I didn’t have clear. Guidelines, suggestions with my clients about the difference between one-on-one and group.

So I expected like, you know, best laid plans that the one-on-one would continue and then the group would be like a lower cost thing for people who, you know, wanted to come into the world. I didn’t realize that all my one-on-ones would then downgrade to the group. [00:04:00] So actually hamstring my income, um, overnight and then, , I still gave them the same sort of service, like email, you know, um, voice note support and stuff.

I didn’t hold the boundary there and go, actually, you know, you’ve chosen, you’ve changed your way. So yeah, I overnight went from plenty to not much, and it was like, oh my goodness, how am I gonna recover from this? But, um, yeah, it bounced back and now I absolutely love it. But in that, in that moment, sometimes we see one path and it ends up going another.

It was like, what have I done?

Tim Melanson: Yeah. Wow. You know what, and that’s probably something that many people have done, especially considering where, like when we do wanna really serve an audience and we see that it’s too expensive for some people we’re like, oh, how can I offer something that’s gonna be a little less expensive?

And then all of a sudden everybody comes to it . So, um, so then, you know, how, how did you get out of it? It was probably some awkward conversations, wasn’t it? Like, how, how did, how did it work?

Suzanne Culberg: So, [00:05:00] It’s interesting because I wasn’t always the, nope. Coach. What do they say? You teach what you most need to learn so you can learn it.

Uh, I had a different niche back then and I’ve Reed recently, but at the MO at the time that it happened, I thought, oh my goodness, like this is done. I’m gonna have to go back to my soul sucking job. Um, But yeah, it was some, some challenging conversations and I am reminded of Brene Brown. She has many quotes, but this one I love.

It’s like, choose discomfort over resentment. So it’s like the discomfort of having the conversation. Um, I basically recorded a video for the group and I owned my place in it. I said, you know, this is, um, This is on me. Like this is not on you guys. I think sometimes when we have a, a business hiccup, we can get blamey on everyone.

And I was like, this, this is on me. Um, because the other quote, I don’t know who it is, but I love it. It’s like what you allow will continue and it’s like I’m allowing this, I am responding to these messages. I am over giving [00:06:00] ands why I work with over givers now. So I basically did, I did a video. I put it in the group.

I tagged everyone way before the tag, everyone tool was available. Like I know that annoys a lot of people, but if you use it well, it’s good. Rather than you having to find everybody’s name and tag them individually. And as a result of that, some people were upset and left and you know, I, I, I understand that, but the majority of people were like, oh.

And it’s, it’s funny too when you do something like that and you say, this is what’s happened. This is what’s gonna happen from here on going forward. The number of people who sent me an email or like apologized who hadn’t done anything. Like, not that they were over apologizing, but it, it just opened up such a deep level of conversation.

But the people who, I’m not saying who was targeted at, but the people who were the, the front runners were the ones who kind of. Left. And yeah, it was a really awkward and and bumpy moment in my business, but I think the who I became as a coach, as a result of that [00:07:00] and going forward, I have such clear boundaries now, and I know it is not for some people, but we are just not a fit.

And that’s okay. That frees them up to find a coach who’s more suited for them, and it frees me up to be a hundred percent me and not have to walk on eggshells because that’s just not helping. That’s beautiful.

Tim Melanson: You hear that so many times too, that those honest conversations always end up working out and they al also, like you say, they end up pushing people that shouldn’t be in your life in the first place.

Right. That’s good. Right on. So now, um, in the pre-chat I learned a little bit about, you turns out you work from home, your husband works from home and you have kids. So how did you set up a jam room? How, like, well what’s, what’s going on with that? How do you not get interrupted?

Suzanne Culberg: This is such a great conversation because.

Like it is a process and there isn’t there. There’s not like a manual or you know how to work from home for dummies, but maybe I could write that now. . Yep, absolutely. [00:08:00] But so when we first started, like my husband was only gonna be working from home for a short time. That was. How, um, it was happening. So we, I haven’t, we have a, a house that I have an office cuz I’ve always worked from home since before.

It was cool and we didn’t have any space for him and we both spend a lot of time talking podcast, well I’m podcasting. He doesn’t, so we can’t be in an office together. Um, because of just, it wouldn’t work. So we were like, oh, okay, well we set. Desk and stuff up in my son’s room. But then what we didn’t realize was because he’s in my son’s room, my son can’t be in his room, so he ended up kind of, my son that is taking up the entire house, like his toys and his stuff spread from the lounge room to the kitchen to outside.

And I was like, this, this is not working like because, and also too, I couldn’t send him to his room because my husband was in there. So , he was like, so after a period of time we’re like, no, that’s not it. So he, my husband’s. [00:09:00] Office is actually in our bedroom, but that works really well because neither of us are in our bedroom during the day.

So he is just got like a little, um, accordion thing behind him to like hide the bed. And so yeah, he’s, he’s, he’s is in our bedroom mine’s in my office, and then the kids have their rooms and then how do I keep them interrupting me? I have a really high. System. It’s a piece of paper and it has yes, written on one side and no written on the other.

And so when my office door is shut on the floor, it’s not even on the wall because we’re renting, so we’re not allowed to fix anything to the wall. On the floor is this piece of paper. And if I’m say handling emails, writing blogs, like doing back office tasks, it’s on. Yes. So they know that they can come in and say, I want a drink of water, or, you know, she, she breathed my air or he’s looking at me funny, you know, kid stuff.

Yeah. But if it’s like right now I’m recording, it’s saying no. So it’s like, unless there is blood, because that’s the other thing [00:10:00] too, setting up your home office. When I had this complex elaborate system, I said to both of them, don’t interrupt unless it’s important. And they’re both nodding going, okay, cool.

Yep. All right, I get it. So here I am and I’m recording something and my daughter comes barging in and I’m like, is it, is it important? And she’s like, yeah, it’s really important. And I’m like, what is it? She goes, I can fit 27 blueberries in my.

And I’m like, we need to have a discussion about what important actually is. And I think this is the thing, sometimes we assume, you know, that people will get what we mean. So now it’s kinda like if there is blood, if you need to go to the hospital, um, you know, something. This is the level of important that I’m talking.

And a lot of people, when I explain this to them, they go, oh, don’t you think that’s really, really harsh? And I’m like, not at all. Because I have a clear boundary about when I’m working so that when I’m with them, like when I finish working, when I go out after this podcast, I can. We can go outside and play in the sun.

[00:11:00] We can, um, you know, watch a movie together and make some popcorn like I am fully with them because I used to like have my phone on me and have email on my phone and be answering clients and no shame or shade to people who still do this. And one day my son said to me, you love your phone more than me.

and that absolutely cut me cuz I was like, wow, I am, I’m there physically with them, like I’m having quantity time, but it’s not quality. So I have really, really clear boundaries that when I’m working, I am working. And when I’m momming I am momming. And when I’m reading a book and don’t wanna be interrupted by anyone, like so we, cuz I think so often we try and do it all and we do all of it, but none of it all poorly,

Tim Melanson: Yeah. Yeah. I, I agree with you completely. Like on all those points, it’s, it’s, uh, it’s very, um, it’s very difficult I think sometimes when you’re working from home because all of the distractions are all there, like at, at all times. [00:12:00] Like for you too, not even just for the kids, but every, everything’s there and.

You know, sometimes it can be really hard to just focus on the one thing you need to be focused on at that particular time, cuz there’s so many other things to be. Keep competing for your attention.

Suzanne Culberg: Oh, a hundred percent. And, and that’s the thing I work with, with a few clients on as well, because a lot of us have, you know, been working from home and if you worked in an office generally, well in Australia at least, I know different countries have different things, but you would get a 15 minute morning tea break and, or a 15 minute afternoon tea break, um, and then a 30 to one.

Lunch break, and in that time you would chat to other people, maybe go outside, hang out in the lunch room, but you would be away from your desk. When we start working from home, we often, we don’t take breaks and even if we do, they’re things to like, I’ll just quickly put a load of washing on, or I’ll quickly do the dishes, and it’s like we’re not actually taking any [00:13:00] time away.

And those things in the office that we. We would factor in and pray. Cause it’s like if they’re not paying me, I ain’t sitting at my desk like I, you know, but we don’t realize the, the benefit to our body to get up and stretch by going for a walk or to interact with somebody else outside of this. And then at home we’re like, no, no.

So you’re sitting at your desk eating your cereal, hoping you don’t get it in your keyboard. Um, multitasking and doing none of it. Well, but not actually. And then when we do take a break instead of, so a lot of people go, I don’t understand why my breaks aren’t really having a. And it’s like, well, if you’re writing a blog and then your break is checking an email, that is not a break.

You’re not switching, you’re still doing the same sort of thing. And also you’re responding to other people’s demands on your time, which is adding to your stress. Why don’t you just go, you know, make yourself a cup of tea or do a couple laps of the house, or sit outside and get yourself a real break. How you, it’s Mark Ney from natural born coaches, and I want to give two very big thumbs up to Tim Lanson and his creative.[00:14:00]

Crew agency. I have been using them for a long time and I am 100% happy. They get the job done right. They’re fast and they let me focus on my business. I don’t have to worry about anything. So again, I want to give them two very big thumbs up. I have no problem recommending them. I don’t give testimonials for everyone because my name is attached to it, but I gladly do so for Tim and the Creative Crew Agency.

So use. You won’t regret it and good luck.

Tim Melanson: Wow. And that leads great right into the next topic, which is practice makes progress or practice makes perfect because routines and rituals are really important in, in that area. So sounds to me like you’ve got some, some of those. Well, can you share a few more?

Suzanne Culberg: So the first thing that I do is my own work, like fill my own cup. As much as it sa it, it sometimes still feels selfish to me. That conditioning or that societal conditioning upbringing, but [00:15:00] like, , I’ve gotta practice what I preach. I teach what I most need to know. So self first isn’t selfish. So ideally I would do that when I first get up in the morning, but I have kids.

So basically I dropped the kids at school. Actually now my husband drops the kids at school because I was like, he works from home too. So I didn’t realize when he was in an office, he would leave before the sun came up. Come back after the sun went down. , obviously I had to do all those things and I wasn’t resentful because I got it, but when he started working from home, I started to feel a bit resentful.

Cause I was like, his one hour and a half commute has become the staircase yet. I still do all these things, but then I had to sit down and like have a conversation without him. I think sometimes we think we’re being clear when we’re hinting. Like it’d be nice if . Yeah, . So I remember sitting down one day and just saying, Would you be open to doing more [00:16:00] with the kids?

Because like you have the time now and it it, once again, it wasn’t a fun conversation. I was kind of, this is uncomfortable, but I didn’t wanna be all passive aggressive kind of thing. I just wanted to be really, really honest. And as a result of that, he now does the morning. So he prepares the lunches and he takes the kids to school.

And so many people say to me, oh, it must be nice or nice for some. I’m like, yeah, it is. And also I k like, we co-created this. So I think sometimes we think, oh, all these things are really nice, but we’ve gotta ask and advocate for them. So he does the the morning thing, but even with them home, I, I don’t relax because I, sometimes they can come in or they can ask for things, so it’s not like total peaceful time.

So once he leaves to take them to school, then that is my time to, you know, journal, meditate, like do my own thing, which sounds like really zen and pretentious. But when I don’t do that, I don’t work as well. Cuz like I coach with people, I [00:17:00] listen to their stuff all day. If I’m not in a. Feeling well inside, then I can’t hold space for others.

So once they said self first is not selfish. So once he leaves, take the kids to school, I do that. . Then when he comes home, I make us a coffee. Well, I don’t drink coffee, but he does, I have a cup of tea and, um, we have, you know, a little bit of a chat. Then he goes about his workday and then I’ll start my client work then, and then at lunch, um, one of us will either take the lead or we would’ve had something from the night before that we just heat up.

So we get to have lunch together, which is brilliant. And depending on. It doesn’t always work cuz sometimes we have calls and in the afternoon I pick up the kids so I pick them up and take them to sport or music or whatever they have going on. Um, and then, and then we have the evening, but the really thing that we’ve gotten clear on is we’ve had to.

Create some sort of system for the, the jobs, the vacuuming, the washing, because otherwise we would never get a break or you know, when you really need to do something. Like, I’ve gotta respond to that email, [00:18:00] but I don’t wanna, so, oh, just go and find something to do. Um, being really clear on the rest time so that you’re not doing stuff to avoid doing your work.

Tim Melanson: Wow. Yeah, I know when I first, uh, was self-employed, my place was super clean, cuz that would be my procrastination. Oh, I’m just gonna sweep ,

Suzanne Culberg: you know. Oh, a hundred percent. I. When, when there’s something that I don’t wanna do, like an email, I don’t wanna respond to whatever I like, do something random, like clean out the lint, filter of the dryer or you know, get, pull apart the dishwasher and clean the middle of it and it’s, and Jeremy will be like, what are you not wanting to do?

Tim Melanson: Well, accountability is not bad. Good. Well, like, congratulations on having that awkward conversation because that’s exactly it. Hints do not work. They never have worked. And, uh, you know, either, either we don’t get them or maybe we don’t want to get them. I’m not sure which one it is, but, uh, but it’s, it’s definitely important to have those, [00:19:00] those conversations and I think that’s great to, I mean, it’s, it’s probably really great for your kids cuz they get some activities with both parents now more

Suzanne Culberg: frequently.

Yeah, so they’ve started walking to school now because we don’t live that far from the school and it’s good exercise for the three of them. So on the way in, they, um, you know, get to chat and, and talk. And he loves history. And now the kids love history. I do not like history in any way, shape, or form. So , it’s interesting, but they get that bonding time that I don’t need to listen to.

And then, um, on the way, , he can either tune into a meeting if there’s something on, because so many things can be remotely. Or he’s also a, a avid podcast listener, so he gets that little time to himself as well. And I think, I don’t know, I haven’t asked him, but I imagine his focus time at work be so much better because he is not being at his desk.

Cause that’s the other thing. When he started working from home, um, he, he didn’t, as I said, didn’t get up to have lunch break with eating at the desk. Sat there all day and it was kind of like his [00:20:00] own. Health and, and wellbeing started to drop because he was at his desk all day. So now he gets that time up and away from the desk and some fresh air and it’s been really beneficial.

Like, and even he’s saying for his mood and productivity.

Tim Melanson: I love it. I love, that’s great. So now, uh, you mentioned that you work with clients, so you must do some, some coaching. And I’m wondering, what about you though? Like, do you have a coach? Like what’s your feelings on, on

Suzanne Culberg: that kind of. A hundred percent.

I would never be without a coach. I believe a coach without a coach is like a doctor without a doctor. And funnily, right now as we speak, my coach, Is also in my program, which, you know, it cracks me up so much because in the coaching world, or at least the coaching world that I’m part of, instead of it being a hierarchy as in like, you know, it kind of weird pyramid scheme dynamic where you work with this person who works with this person, who works with this person.

I think it’s more kind of like the round table cuz it’s like, I coach her on boundaries, [00:21:00] which is something my coaches like, actually. Yeah, I have a, uh, um, uh, something to learn from you here. And then she coaches on like, um, you know, money mindset and stuff. And I have a lot , a lot to learn there. and it’s just, it’s amazing.

And there’s different people in, in my program who I’ve worked with in different aspects. Like one of my podcasts, my co-host is also in my program and then I’ve worked with her. And I think there’s something about like the rising tide lifts all ships and us. More traditionally in community, we would have different people who had different roles that we would go to for things.

And then over time, I think society in general has transitioned to subject matter experts. And then, you know, the, you put them kind of on the pedestal and you know, they’re the medicine woman or they’re this, that we don’t then interact with. And I think the gift of the online world is us going back to more like, well, this is a person that helps me with this, but then having very clear boundaries.

You know, as a coach, sometimes you can [00:22:00] inadvertently take over the session and it’s like, no, actually in this space I’m the client. So having that, so sometimes clients that I work with who are also friends, if our session’s an hour will make an hour 15. So we can have 15 minutes of like, catch up, what’s happening with this?

What’s happening with that? What are the kids doing? And then, okay. Let’s go. So we don’t mess that up because sometimes I think where it doesn’t work well is it devolves to a chit chat and not a powerful coaching session or, um, you end up coaching the person that you are then paying for and it gets all kinds of awkward.

So yes, I always have a coach, at least one, sometimes several depending. And um, just the space to take my own coach hat off and get people to look at my own messy mind is just in. .

Tim Melanson: Wow, that’s amazing. This is the first I’ve heard of, of, of anybody who has clients that also are their coaches, and vice versa.

But I think it’s brilliant. I mean, when you think about it, this whole thing about, oh, well, you know, my coach is [00:23:00] better than me, type thing of like, well, you know, uh, they’re not gonna hire me for anything that. Really disingenuous, really, because there’s nobody that is perfect at everything. It just doesn’t make any sense.

We all have strengths, we all have weaknesses. And it’s the same thing as like when you are starting to hire people in your business, right? When you’re looking to delegate. I mean, the whole point of that is that you’re not. Perfect at something. So you need somebody who it, it’s in their gift zone and then you can also help them as well.

So I think that’s really cool. I know that it happens a lot in like regular delegating of, of business tasks, but it also makes so much sense in the personal coaching type stuff That so good on you for figuring that out. . That’s

Suzanne Culberg: awesome. Thank you. Yeah, it works really well. But once again, you have to have really, really clear boundaries because sometimes it can, you know, as I said, devolve into more of a chit chat or people take information.

And this is something that I’m really clear with, with clients I have who are friends and all this sort of thing. What is said [00:24:00] in the coaching container, it’s kind of like fight club, except nobody gets beaten up. stays in the coaching container because sometimes, um, you know, People, it’s never nefarious, but people, when you’re a coach, come kind of dump their stuff on you and it’s like, no, no.

In the Friendship Circle, I’m just as much a like cheerleader or vent or support, but the coaching is what I get paid for. And having to be really clear on that. And once again, sometimes it can be offensive to people because they’re like, oh, I wasn’t after coaching and it’s. I’m not saying that you are trying to get free coaching or anything like that, but when I feel the shift from friends Sue who’s like, yes, they’re terrible and they’re the worst in the world and whatever, to coach Sue who’s like, have you considered?

And it’s like, yeah, no. Like this is the version of me and it’s something, you know, to, to be mindful of. And another thing I have, you know, in with my friends is [00:25:00] before they start dumping their stuff, and this is I think, good for everybody, whether you’re a coach or not. Like, are you available for event?

Like do you have space to listen to event? And sometimes I’ll be like, sure, hit me. And other times I’ll be like, not right now. It doesn’t mean that I don’t love and care and wanna support you, but if I’m at capacity and someone else is having a moment, I can’t. Hold space for that. Like I can’t listen to that right now.

It allows them to go find and ask someone else, cuz you know where you’re distracted, . Like, I know this is a perfect parent example, but I’m concentrating on something and the kid’s marching and like, can, can we do this? And you just go, yeah, yeah. Like not even paying any attention and next thing they run off excited and you’re like, what did I just agree to

So if a friend is having a hard time and they need someone to be that shoulder to cry and all to you. Support them and you are completely unavailable. It actually costs a friendship more if you listen and then don’t really give them their full space. Rather than saying like, you know, I’m at [00:26:00] capacity today.

Um, you know, circle back tomorrow or next week, or whatever. It gives them space to find someone else to ask, and I think that’s something we don’t do. We just go and dump our stuff on everybody and. . Yeah. Clear communication is so key. And also choosing your audience once again, and I practice what I most need to know, all excited about my own podcast show my husband and he like picks it apart.

I’m like, see, this is, this is an example of this is what he does for a living. He thinks he’s being helpful. What I wanted was to say, yeah, you were also well done. So sometimes we get really annoyed at people when we realized like, this wasn’t the right person to go to in this situation.

Tim Melanson: Wow. That’s really good.

Yeah, and, and I mean, on that same note, you know, do you have a. For me to vent, but there’s also on the other side of it are, am I listening just to listen or am I listening to give you advice? , right.

Suzanne Culberg: Yes. Being, being clear on what kind of feedback you want. So, uh, it, it depends, like some people, even friends who know what I do, and they, they present me with [00:27:00] something and I kind of sit back and I’m like, so do you want friends Sue’s response or do you want like coach Sue’s response?

Because, you know, sometimes friends with Sue’s will be like, oh, they’re terrible. They’re the worst in the world. Like, I get in the pool with them. . Yeah. Whereas Coach Su would be, have you considered? And they’ll be like, Ugh. And also, sometimes you, you don’t want that. Like, you know, when with my podcast or with anything, I put out my book, you know, there are times where I’m like, Hey, can you give me some.

Feedback like I’m after constructive criticism or I’m after, you know, improvements or edits. But you know, often when we’ve really created something that we’ve spent a lot of hours and time on it, and I think this is something that we, we don’t consider, it’s not that. We don’t value the suggestions, but you’ve spent a lot of time on something and all you’re really wanting is someone to tell you, Hey, you did a good job,

And someone’s like, oh no, this, you should capitalize this, or you’ve spelled this wrong, and it just suddenly feels like, oh, so, [00:28:00] but you’ve gotta be clear on what you are asking for when you are sharing something.

Tim Melanson: Yeah, I agree a hundred percent. All right, so it’s time for your guest solo. So tell me what’s exciting, your business.

Right. .

Suzanne Culberg: So I run a group, um, program called Why Wait, and it’s a w and an eight, which is like a sideways or upright infinity. And it’s, what are you waiting for? And so many of us are like, I’ll get to that, you know, after the kids are at school after my birthday, after Valentine’s date. But if you are looking for a reason not to take action, you’ll always find one.

So why wait is. Taking action now, getting the shit done that you actually want to get done, and doing it in a community of other people who are also. Potentially people pleasers over givers. Cause you know what it’s like to sign up to a program like this is gonna be the thing. And then two weeks in, you’re not even logging in or listening to anything anymore and you’re like, Ugh, that wasn’t the thing.

And looking for the next thing. There’s no magic bullet. There’s no quick fix. So join a community of people who are also [00:29:00] putting themselves last so that together and we can heal in community and start taking the baby steps that even in your brain will be screaming. What’s that ever gonna do? , but these baby steps done every day for a long period of time result in, you know, big changes.

So that’s what’s going on in my world, and if you wanna check it out, head over to my website.

Tim Melanson: Wow, that’s so smart too. Because, I mean, that, that’s the thing is that all of us sort of want these big changes right now, but the, our brains don’t work that way. The, it’s it’s little bits at a time that make

Suzanne Culberg: progress.

A hundred percent. Because when you think about it, it’s really confronting to our brain to have a big change. Like it’s, it upsets our nervous system and then we need to regulate. And then so many of us, what, how do we regulate, like overeating or over drinking or over scrolling, and then we are not actually taking any action because we’re, you know, calming ourselves down.

And so many people, we get on ourselves and then we’re like, oh, I just need to find the right diet or the right program. And it’s like, no, you just need to find another way. To calm down [00:30:00] because this behaviors actually make sense. Cuz in times of old, if we were fearing for our lives, like being chased by a tiger or something, you are not gonna slow down to eat.

So the, when you are eating and in using that against yourself, it’s actually your body’s inherent way to be like, I’m safe in this moment. There are other ways to be safe. And that’s what we explore in the group and just rewiring our body’s response to.

Tim Melanson: Love it. So who would be the, the person that would get the most out of one of your programs?

Suzanne Culberg: Anyone? So like I work primarily with women. I haven’t had any, um, men in the programs tend to work more one-on-one, but women who. Like, feel like they’re always last and it’s just like, I will do this one day. Like once the kids are old enough to, you know, tie their own shoes, , or people who I, I lovingly refer to them as my Warner Entrepreneurs, not with judgment, because I was one too.

I went from certification to certification. Like once I’ve got this under [00:31:00] my belt, then I can start my business and one day I. My husband said it tongue in cheek, but it changed my life. He’s like, you don’t have a business, you have an expensive hobby. And I was like, oh. But he was right. . So when, if you’ve been putting off whatever action you wanna take to one day when you’ve lost weight, made money or whatever, but the, the, you know, the obstacle is the way, and you actually want to start chipping away at that.

That’s, this is the program for you. Awesome. So how

Tim Melanson: do we find out more about this then, Suzanne?

Suzanne Culberg: Head over to my website, suzanne colberg.com, which I’m sure you’ll put in the show notes cuz Colberg is an interesting spelling and um, yeah, it’s all laid out and explained on there.

Tim Melanson: Awesome. Thank you so much for rocking out with me today, Suzanne.

This has been a lot of fun.

Suzanne Culberg: Thank you so much for having me, Tim.

Tim Melanson: Awesome. And to the listeners, make sure you subscribe right in comment. We’ll see you next time on the Work at Home Rockstar

Suzanne Culberg: podcast. Thanks for listening. To learn how you can become a work at home rockstar or become a better one, head on over to workathomerockstar.com today.[00:32:00]

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